Someone asked me the other day if I could beat up my brother. It’s an odd question. After hearing it, I paused—long enough for the person who asked to jump back in with a clarifying question before I even answered. He said, “Are you bigger than him?”
I could handle this part quickly.
Yes, I am bigger. I always have been. He isn’t small, but I am definitely bigger.
But the original question remained unanswered. In fact, we were interrupted, so I never got the chance to answer it.
So, I will answer the question in this blog post.
No, I couldn’t beat up my brother. I don’t know what situation would make me start beating him.
That makes me unable. I think he feels the same way. I guess if he ever tried to beat me up, I’d fight back—and my friend would finally have his answer.
The conversation made me think about self-control. Let’s say the answer was yes—but since I’m unwilling to beat him up, the question is moot.
I think people will respect me (and Justin) more if we avoid a physical altercation. We have for 51 years, so the odds are great we will keep our streak going. Most of society believes that violence isn’t a good way to answer a question.
But it made me think more broadly. How much better would all of us be if we didn’t just do whatever was allowed or within our abilities? Could we hold off on saying things we weren’t quite sure were true until we verified them?
The small white lies in life are what tend to cause us not to trust others. We can boast about things in our lives in grandiose terms, assuming they won’t be checked. There are plenty of times when we can take a little more or give a little less, and nobody will notice the difference.
Two phrases I often hear are “if you’re not cheating, you’re not trying” and “It is only cheating if you get caught.” Are either of those phrases true? They can’t be if we want to live in a decent society.
Keeping my fellow man in mind should serve as a check on my behavior. Treating others the way I want to be treated keeps me honest. I’m not perfect; I fail from time to time. I likely fail more often than I realize.
The more self-control I have, the better off I and the people around me are likely to be.
